Sometimes we must take a moment to do a little inventory on ourselves. One of my biggest struggles is dealing with disappointment. I am disappointed very easily because I genuinely expect people to do exactly what they say every time with consistency and diligence. My motto has always been to not make a vow, promise or agreement if you know or even think that it is not something that you can do or keep up. I don't expect anything from anyone that had not been talked about or agreed upon so yeah, I expect things to happen as discussed, especially when I didn't ask for it or look for it.
If my job offers a promotion if I complete certain goals, then when those goals are reached, I expect the promotion. If I order a burger with cheese, because it is on the menu and I see that the cashier has put cheese on the order, that is an agreement that I want cheese. So when I get home and there is not cheese on my burger, I am disappointed. If a friend comes to me and says they want to support my business by purchasing equipment and tells me it has been ordered, when it doesn't arrive after 3 or 4 months has passed, I will be disappointed. If my husband doesn't follow through with his promises, then yes, regardless of his reason, I am disappointed. I thought is was okay to expect for people to do what they say that are going to do.
I learned that this way of thinking is really me setting myself up for disappointment. I am learning that most people mean what they say when they say it. However, I have also learned that there are not to many instances that we count up the cost or consider the future when making an agreement with someone else. We don't think things through and we definitely don't consider how if affects the next person.
Someone I love, respect and admire sent me an article about dealing with disappointment. I began to read and a lot of things were really hitting home. Even at this age, there are parts of my life that need to be worked on. Understand that if something is important enough, you will not have a problem making the necessary adjustments.
Before I go, I want to share a few ways that will help us to deal with things that don't go as we expected and therefore the only thing disappointed in disappointment. This article, which was written by Expert Blogger, Racheal Pace gave 10 ideas on how this can be handled but I will only name a few with with brief thoughts of my own. She suggest we deal with disappointment in the following ways:
Verbalize your expectations - No one can read your mind
Learn to compromise - A little give and take has never hurt
Don't take everything so personal - Everything is not about you
Look for effort, not perfection - It is easy to see what its not, let's look for what it is
Don't assume they think the same as you do - NO ONE thinks like you do
Do not make them responsible for your happiness -Get your LIFE
Disappointment is a part of this journey we call life, even the Bible speaks of it in Proverbs 13:12 which says "Hope deferred maketh the heart sick, but longing fulfilled is a tree of life". Disappointment is inevitable, we just need to manage it in a healthy and productive way. Be Blessed!